I don't know about you, but when I finally get to this point in the year, it feels like I've been holding my breath and can finally exhale. Our already busy lives have been even more hectic with all the activities of the season, and now, we've come to the end.
The time between Christmas Eve and New Year can seem like a strange calm after a storm. I wonder if that's how Mary felt that night after giving birth to Jesus? As if this unexpected, unexplainable pregnancy wasn't stressful enough, the Emperor ordered everyone to travel to their family's hometown for a census which allowed them to be taxed.
Psychologist Thomas Holmes developed a Stress Scale in which he assigned a numerical value to stress-producing experiences. Of course, the greatest stress of our lives are usually the result of changes - changing jobs, moving, new relationships, etc.
According to Dr. Holmes, simply living through Christmas earns a hefty 14 stress points. Maybe you have felt for weeks like you have been all stressed up with no place to let off steam.
Someone actually tried to calculate the stress which Mary experienced that first Christmas. Pregnancy alone is worth 40 points. If the pregnancy is unplanned, you should add 20 points. According to the Bible, Mary went to live with her cousin Elizabeth for several months prior to giving birth, so she earned 25 more points for a change in living location. A marriage is worth 50 stress points, and her marriage to Joseph was more stressful since the baby wasn't his.
A change in community status (that is a scandal) can add nearly 75 stress points. Then, add 25 points when you discover that you don't have a hotel reservation, and there's no place to stay.
Christmas is a time of surprises, but many of life's surprises are disappointing, even disturbing. Mary and Joseph were surprised to find no vacancy at the Bethlehem Inn. Did they have their first fight over who forgot to make the reservations?
Or perhaps Joseph was arguing with the innkeeper and finally in exasperation said, "Come on, buddy, can't you see my wife is pregnant?" But the inn keeper was unmoved and said, "Well, that's not my fault." And Joseph might have said, "Not mine either."
There are times when all of us look at our lives and want to announce, "It's not my fault."
As Mary's pregnancy became apparent to the whole world, she probably wanted to wear a sign which explained her condition, but who would believe her?
According to Dr. Holmes' scale, giving birth is worth 39 stress points and that doesn't even calculate the added stress of having a Carpenter with rough hands as your midwife.
Suzy was just barely four and she had just gotten almost everything she wanted for Christmas. After all the presents were finally opened, she turned to her mother and said, Mommy, I hope Mary and Joseph have another baby next year.
Mary probably wasn't hoping that. On top of everything else, she had the stress of unexpected guests like shepherds and Magi. Dr. Holmes says that when our stress exceeds 200 points, our health is in grave jeopardy. With just the information we know, Mary's stress scored a record 424 high.
That kind of makes you question all those beautiful pictures of a calm perfect Madonna with her new born child.
Maybe all the stress explains why the scriptures don't record a single word Mary said that night. We hear from the shepherds and from the angels, but all the Bible says about her was:
"And Mary kept all of these things and pondered them in her heart." (Luke 2:19)
I wonder if silent pondering may be the only way to really experience the true miracle of this night?
Silent pondering might be the antidote for much of our stress. We are so prone to talking, to glib explanations and sound-bite philosophy. Perhaps, what would bring us the most peace is to spend more time in silent, sacred, pondering.
I read about a little boy who was in his first Nativity play and was one of the shepherds. You know, the kind who wear bathrobes. He was not a lead shepherd, just one of the chorus.
When the time came for the baby to arrive, he crowded in close so he could get a better look. Then, forgetting what was really happening, he stepped to the footlights and shouted, Mommy, Daddy, Mary had her baby, and it's a boy.
And it was. And Mary looked into that red wrinkled face and silently pondered the surprising joy she found in holding the One who came to bring us peace and good will.
Imagine Mary's surprise when a group of shepherds suddenly appeared out of the night. And imagine the surprise of the shepherds who had heard that glorious announcement of the angels and went off looking for the Saviour of the world only to find a tiny baby in the straw of a stable.
We have romanticized the shepherds, but in that day they were a pretty rough lot who drank too much and bathed too little. The laws of that day wouldn't allow a shepherd to offer testimony in court or even worship in the temple. They were considered unclean and undesirable people. They were the un-good of the world.
I wonder what Mary thought when suddenly a troupe of these folks showed up that night. Maybe she looked into the baby's tender eyes and realized he had come to bring God's love to all people especially the un-good.
I love that collection of letters that children have written to Santa Claus. One said: Dear Santa: You did not bring me anything good last year. You did not bring me anything good the year before that. This is your last chance. - Ellen.
My favourite said:
Dear Santa: There are three little boys who live in this house. There is Jeffery. He is two. There is David. He is four. There is Norman and he is seven. Jeffery is good some of the time, and David is good some of the time. But Norman is good all of the time. I am Norman.
The trouble is, we aren't Normans; we are shepherds. We are the un-good. We are people who've tried to follow the star of our hopes and dreams, but somehow end up in the straw of a smelly stable.
Yet, the message of Christmas to the wise and to the shepherds and to the un-good is that God's love has come to live among us and lead us all to a place of peace. Peace with one another, and peace within, and peace with the God who made us.
Over the years, I have lost a good bit of my self-confidence and almost all of my sense of certainty. I read of the immensities of this universe and realize my life is only the flaring of a match against eternity's darkness. I look within and see too much emptiness, brokenness, and sin.
But the message of Christmas is addressed to all of that.
Christmas calls us to ponder in sacred silence that God's love was born in a barn to a poor teenage peasant girl. Jesus is God's Christmas gift of love for all the un-good like you and like me.
Vessels journey to the back side of the moon and report back that it is cold and aching and dark. And you read about the other planets that they are acrid and have volcanoes that spew noxious fumes and nothing indicates that life exists on any of them.
And then I ponder our world where there are friends and fields and forests and seas and mountains where musicians play music and artists paint pictures and philosophers think great thoughts and dreamers build castles in the air and engineers put foundations under them, and even with all life's stress there comes a wave of peace as I remember WE LIVE ON THE VISITED PLANET.
Well, at last Christmas came. Children thought it would never get here, but as the calendar of my life has fewer and fewer pages, it seems that each year Christmas comes more quickly. Maybe it hasn't brought all you'd hoped for. Maybe some of your dreams for this year haven't come true. Can I tell you a secret? Christmas is really not about happiness. It is about joy.
Mary was 13 or 14, and she had just had a baby on the floor of a barn without an anaesthetic. She was probably not very happy. Yet, regardless of how difficult the birth, I have yet to see a mother fail to smile as she held her child.
Though in pain, Mary knew joy. That is the real message of Christmas. For just a moment ponder with me and Mary, the miracle that is yours. Look into the eyes of the baby Jesus and see there the relentless, unconditional love of God for you. Despite all the stress of her life, Mary gave birth to a miracle. Ponder that miracle and have a M-a-r-y Christmas.
This sermon was first preached in the Metropolitan Community Church of Manchester. Click here for further information.